Couple counselling or relationship therapy is aimed at giving the couple a better understanding of relationships and a shift away from the fairy tale idea of relationships. Couples are taught communication skills which is a crucial skill for the success of their relationship. Couples usually engage in the ‘BLAME GAME’. This is pointed out and a shift in communication is recommended. At the start of the process a shift is needed in each partner to recognise that you CANNOT change your partner. You only have control over your own behaviour. What this means is that you need to focus on your own process and the shifts and changes that you need to make in YOURSELF.
Other useful skills which you will gain are:
- A better understanding of yourself and your partner
- An understanding of you and your partners Conflict Resolution Styles.
- A rekindling of the relationship
- An enhancement of what is or has worked well in the relationship
- A positive future oriented perspective
3 PHASES IN A ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP
- The Honeymoon Phase – this phase is the initial phase in your relationship where you see your partner and the relationship as all positive. You usually overlook negatives that may come up or don’t see them altogether.
- The second phase of the relationship is the Conflict or Disillusionment Phase – you start seeing the negative characteristics of your partner and start questioning your decision to be in this relationship. You may feel like you are no longer in love with your partner. This is a very common and normal phase which may lead to separation or divorce.
- The third phase is the Mature Phase where you get to know your partner for who they are and accept them for who they are. Acceptance equates to Pleasure.